Problem is who decides your being assertive and not aggressive?
I had this all the time while growing up from the bitch-psycho-mother-from-hell-who-shall-not-be-named (issues? me?!? *innocent look*) that I was getting too big for my boots, who do you think you are, etc. etc. Meant I had the confidence and assertiveness of an ant; and still get very shy around people.
It's a northern thing, but also a British thing. Kills your confidence and all. So I'm not totally sure what is aggressive and what is assertive. I think depends on which side you are on.
Hence the female strength = bitch routine BS that women get. If people don't like your assertiveness they label it 'troublesome' 'aggression' 'diva attitude' - but being sure about yourself and who you want to be is none of those things. As long as you're not rude.
(no subject)
Date: 2006-09-09 05:42 pm (UTC)Problem is who decides your being assertive and not aggressive?
I had this all the time while growing up from the bitch-psycho-mother-from-hell-who-shall-not-be-named (issues? me?!? *innocent look*) that I was getting too big for my boots, who do you think you are, etc. etc. Meant I had the confidence and assertiveness of an ant; and still get very shy around people.
It's a northern thing, but also a British thing. Kills your confidence and all. So I'm not totally sure what is aggressive and what is assertive. I think depends on which side you are on.
Hence the female strength = bitch routine BS that women get. If people don't like your assertiveness they label it 'troublesome' 'aggression' 'diva attitude' - but being sure about yourself and who you want to be is none of those things. As long as you're not rude.